Friday at the movies

Ta-da! Guess what I’m learning? 

In my debut video blog, my friend Robyn (

[info]robbiewriter

) and I offer you backstage-pass peeks into our writerly lives. Scenes range from the informative (Corner Bakery or Panera?) to the poignant (I Want a Girl Scout Badge!), and include a show-stopping shout-out to

[info]thatgirlygirl

. Stay tuned for the audience interactive at the end. 

This clip’s appropriate for time-wasters viewers of all ages, so grab a bag of popcorn and hit the play button! 

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ciNYndAMUg8]

Fashionista at five

I’ve spent this past weekend going through old family photographs. In this one, dated nineteen never-mind, I’m wearing my Easter ensemble. (That’s five-year-old me, to the left of two of my sisters.) The hemline’s a bit too short and the midsection’s much too tight, probably because this picture was taken around Christmas. 

Notice that the three of us are wearing identical dresses. You know what that means, don’t you? I’m doomed to at least another season of this same outfit in a larger size, passed down to me by my older sister. Maybe that’s why I’ve got a pained look on my face, the pinchingly snug waistband being a more benign possibility. 

Today, however, I’m smiling at some retroactive scheudenfreude. My sisters are sporting sensible saddle oxfords, miniature braids and tiny barrettes…but hey, look at me! I’m all dolled up in patent-leather mary janes, with a giant gardenia in my hair!  Apparently, even back then, I knew that accessories can make or break an outfit. 

I hope you enjoyed a fun-filled holiday weekend, and that you remembered to take lots of pictures.




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Signs and wonders

I’m making lots of progress with my writing this week, hallelujah and amen! To what do I owe this recent success? The Fast Draft Express is one possibility, or it could be the purple bracelet I’m wearing. Or maybe it’s the product pitches inspirational email messages I’ve received from Daily Candy.

This first one arrived on Wednesday:

Subject: Holey Roller

Brothers and sisters, let us bow our heads in prayer.

The dark days of longing for sinfully decadent pastries are over. The day has come when we can satisfy our temptations with something holey. As in Holey Donuts. 

[S]ince they’ve got a fifth of the fat and a fraction of the calories of regular donuts, you can indulge your lust without guilt. […] Amen to that. 

Then – and I swear on my stack of gilt-edged Bibles,  I’m not making this up – I got another one today! 

Subject: Holy Crap

Every morning when you wake up at your beau’s …

You say: “Want me to run and get us some coffee?”
You think: I must get to a Starbucks loo stat.

He says: “Aw, thanks, baby, I’d love a latte.”
He thinks: Why won’t this chick poop in my john?

You’ll overcome your bathroom shyness with the Breeza, a deodorizing toilet seat. 

Serendipity, synchronicity, a sign from the universe or a message from God — I’m one of those who finds metaphors in even the most unlikely places. Well, maybe not in a pastry box or under the toilet seat lid, but you know what I mean. 

One more example (and I’ve saved the best for last): my Double Delight rose bush unfolded into full bloom earlier this week! I grabbed my camera and snapped a picture to show-and-tell you.  How did this fragrant flower come by its fortune-cookie name? I refuse to believe it’s a coincidence.
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Divine inspiration

And it came to pass that in the year of our Lord nineteen hundred and thirty-eight, two farm boys met each other – and their destinies – at the Florida Bible Institute. They socialized and studied Scripture together, then went out into the world to preach the Gospel. 

 

Yesterday, I received a copy of their 1939 college yearbook in the mail. Just for you, I’ve scanned a picture of their Junior class. Count down 3 rows, and check out the 4th photo to your right. Can you guess who that is? 

 

My Permanent Records

I have very few artifacts from my childhood — a handful of family photos, a half-page “Big Top Revival” newspaper clipping, and a couple of Jesus fans (cardstock images of Christ stapled to tongue depressors, funeral home information printed on the back. How’s that for the power of suggestion?). Otherwise, nada. 

I’m not certain how many schools I enrolled in, where they’re located, or when I attended. Part of my research involves piecing it all together. But one thing I now know with a certainty: Permanent Records are a myth. After three to five years, your cumulative files are stripped to bare bones, picked clean of any prose. What’s left? Census data, grades, and test scores — nothing else. No evidence that you were an angel or, for that matter, an incorrigible student. Just the facts, ma’am, and sometimes even those are sorely lacking. 

Nevertheless, I now know more about where my father went to school! Even better, I talked to the college representative on Friday, and she offered to send me something fabulous. It will most certainly add an element of irony to my memoir, and a bit of celebrity flair. Maybe I’ll do a little show-and-tell when it arrives. Are you interested?

 

In other news: I keep having to switch my bracelet from one wrist to the other — so often, in fact, that the weekend went by in a purple blur. Here’s a couple of positive developments: I somehow managed to finish my SisterDivas column five whole days before my deadline, and I’m making good progress in the first week of the Fast Draft project. No comment on the quality (eyes her bracelet), but I’ve written lots of words.  

Happy Monday, everyone. Have a memorable week!

“If you can’t say anything nice…”

A) Come sit next to me.

B) Don’t say anything at all.

C) Hire a translator.

D) Put on your walking shoes and go exploring.

E) Ease up on the espresso. 

F) Yank that purple bracelet off your wrist.

G) All of the above.

H) None of the above. 

Bonus Points: Explain your choice(s), or come up with your own creative answer.

My choices: B and D, ’cause it’s only been two days and I’m already tempted to add F. 

Pollyanna boards the bullet train

I’m happy to report that I’ve been wearing my purple bracelet for more than 24 hours now, and I haven’t had to move it to the other arm once. Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil – that’s me, for at least the next three weeks.

 

Maybe.

 

While browsing my friends’ blogs tonight, Julie’s FAST DRAFT EXPRESS post caught my eye. 50,000 words, maybe more, drafted in a single month? It sounded so seductive. “No more of this bird-feather-by-bird-feather business,” I thought. “I’ll give wings to several flocks of birds at a single sitting!” True to my nature, and before I could stop myself, I signed up.

And now, a swarm of butterflies have taken flight in my tummy. Nothing fatal, of course, just a little fear of the unknown. I don’t regret my decision, but if I’m going to be successful, I need to (re)focus on the positive. When I squint my eyes and tilt my head just so, I can see how being forced to writer faster will help me outpace my inner critic.  And it’s the perfect set-up for failure opportunity to use some choice swear words remain positive under pressure. Right? Right?
 

My dear writer friends, what do you think about FAST DRAFT writing (or for that matter, NaNoWriMo and other projects of that ilk)? Tell me everything – the good, bad, and ugly, plus your tips and tricks. If I have to switch my band back and forth because of our conversation, so be it. Before this bullet train leaves the station, I need you to sit down next to me and dish. 

By the way, I still have a few purple wristbands available, so if you want me to send you one, just ask. A few people thought about joining us in Project Pollyanna, then declined. Not that I’m pointing fingers, mind you; I’m just pointing out the facts. 

One more thing, posted without commentary because I want my purple bracelet to stay put. Apparently, I’m not the only one thinking about writing a memoir. At the annual Radio and Television Correspondents’ dinner last night, President Bush told the audience he’s contemplating a book about his life. “I’m thinking of something really fun and creative for mine,” he said. “You know, maybe a pop-up book.”

Let’s band together

Have you seen these purple bracelets? Just today, Oprah featured them on her show, but they’ve been popping up all over in the past couple of months. The brainchild of William Bowen (A Complaint Free World.org), these bands are a visible admonition to, as Gandi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.”

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to wear a purple bracelet on the same wrist for 21 consecutive, complaint-free days. If you find yourself kvetching, gossiping or criticizing, you have to move it to the other wrist and begin again. 
“You will find that your entire life is happier, more loving, more positive and more abundant,” Bowen says. But wait, there’s more! He’ll send you a “Certificate of Happiness” if you quit yer whining for three weeks straight.

Sounds, um, challenging, doesn’t it? I’m not complaining, mind you, just musing. But hey, I’m game to try it, if you are. I’ve ordered 10 purple bracelets, and I’m going to wear one. I’m willing to mail out the other nine to LJ friends who want to join me in the challenge. We’ll blog about our efforts to fashion a complaint-free world, one purple bracelet and one day at a time. 

(Psst! If you’re not into public accountability, you can secretly order any number of them from the organization’s website.)

Another nail in their coffins?

Mathematicians as Vampire Slayers? Who knew? Apparently, calculus is the garlic necklace around the scientific community’s collective neck.

“Proof” that vampires don’t exist? Meh, it might be bad news for some of you, but it doesn’t exactly drive a stake through this wussy-girl’s heart. However, I’ve got a lot of writer friends who make their bones writing fantasy lit, and I confess that over time, I’ve grown more curious about the worlds and characters they write about. Still, I’m skeptical. And a scaredy-cat. Yep, that just about sums it up.

One day, I might be brave enough to read a vampire story all the way through. Under a cozy blanket and with all the lights on, of course. Meantime, and for Poetry Friday, I thought it’d be fun to sink our teeth into this little Shel Silverstein piece.

MONSTERS I’VE MET

I met a ghost, but he didn’t want my head,
He only wanted to know the way to Denver.
I met a devil, but he didn’t want my soul,
He only wanted to borrow my bike awhile.
I met a vampire, but he didn’t want my blood,
He only wanted two nickels for a dime.
I keep meeting all the right people—
At all the wrong times.

Have a great weekend, everyone! May all your monsters be imaginary — and only as scary as you want them to be.
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A Trip down Memory Lane

Unarchiving memoir material is so exciting, especially if it’s a long-forgotten fact. It’s rather like being handed the keys to a souped-up muscle car that’s been stored for years in someone’s garage. Sure, it’s suffered some dings and dents, and the upholstery’s a little ragged around the edges. But oh, listen to how that V-8 engine purrs…

Hey, why don’t you hop in? Let’s take it on a joyride down Memory Lane!  I’ll point out some landmarks from my childhood, mileposts 1960 through 1970. Then I’ll slip into the passenger seat and hand you the wheel, so you can describe what you see in the rear-view mirror.* 

Vrrrrrooooom. Are you ready? 

Apple Records and A-Line dresses

Big Chief Pencil Tablets and Bookmobiles

Culottes and cross-stitching aprons in Home Ec.

Duck and Cover and Drink and Wet dolls

 

Mr. Ed and Easy-Bake Ovens

Flexible Modular Scheduling and Field trips to Dana Point tide pools, plus the California Missions

 

Gym Suits and Gilligan’s Island

 

Herman Munster and Hopscotch

 

I Think I Love You (David Cassidy and the Partridge Family, who else?)

Jacks and molded Jello (bonus points if it includes shredded carrots or fruit)
 

Klick-Klacks 

Lost in Space

 

Moon Pies and Magilla Gorilla

 

Nancy Sinatra’s walkin’ boots

 

Octopussy and the Living Daylights, the book 

 
Patent leather shoes with pantyhose and Paint by Numbers

Queen for a Day

 

Ramona the Pest  

SRA kits and skate keys

 

Trading Stamps (S & H Green Stamps, Blue Chip, etc.)

Uninterrupted, Sustained Silent Reading (aka Drop Everything and Read)

 

Vietnam War and Velvet Elvis pictures

Wienermobile and Winchell Mahoney Time

  

X-ray shoe-fittings 

Yahtzee

 

Zorro (TV reruns and Wonderful World of Disney)  

Your turn! What do you remember?

*I tried linking each milepost marker, for those of you who want or need a tour guide’s explanation. Unfortunately, LJ’s not cooperating. I’m sorry!

 photo credit