Happy New Year, Happy Anniversary, Happy Me

Yes, it’s possible to find lasting love with a left-click of your mouse. To wit: today’s my wedding anniversary. 

Late in the last millenium, I moved back to California, leaving behind the remnants of a marriage that ended long before it was legally over. It was a triumphant return to familiar surroundings, sunshine, and myself.  I fell back in love with the neighborhoods I remembered from my childhood, and I reclaimed what I’d lost in my failed relationship. In the process, I cleared the path for a new life and new love. 

Over the next couple of years, I went on a number of dates with men who, as it turned out (how to say this kindly?), didn’t meet my admittedly high expectations. Meanwhile, I busied myself with my sons and my career, teaching and traveling around the world to give keynote speeches for the professional organization over which I presided. But when I returned home from my journeys, I turned the key to an empty home and empty heart, save for my wonderful sons and sweet kitty, Zoe.  

Long story made short: I discovered an online dating community (Matchmaker.com), logged on and met my future husband. Fast-forward past his initial email to me, the standard “phone chemistry” test that followed, the first “is-there-a-physical-attraction” meeting at a coffee house, and the eventual “I’d like to explore an exclusive relationship, would you?”  Zillions of dates and about 2.5 years later, the man I’d met in cyberspace proposed marriage in my favorite spot, an oasis in Palm Springs. I knew much earlier that this mensch was the man of my dreams, so I cried happy tears as I said, “yes.” We were married in an intimate ceremony in Santa Barbara, on a summer-like morning four years ago today. 

About twenty years ago, a Newsweek cover story, “The Marriage Crunch,” suggested a woman in her forties was more likely to be hit by a terrorist bomb than Cupid’s arrow. Long before that theory got debunked, I proved it wrong, and I’m now living happily ever after with my very own Prince Charming. 

(Yes, there is a connection between this story and my nonfiction work about trophy wives, but that’s another blog entry and a chapter in my book.)


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42 Comments

  2. Happy New Year Melodye, and more importantly, Happy Anniversary!

    What a wonderful story! My 4th Anniversary is also this year (Valentine’s Day).

  5. Happy Anniversary, Melodye! I deeply relate to the feeling of returning to an empty home and heart at the end of a tremendously effective day-of-business…your words brought tears of hope to my eyes. Thanks for sharing your encouraging story.

  6. Happy Anniversary, Melodye! I deeply relate to the feeling of returning to an empty home and heart at the end of a tremendously effective day-of-business…your words brought tears of hope to my eyes. Thanks for sharing your encouraging story.

  9. Happy Anniversary to you and your spouse!

    Did you know I met my lovely bride through an online dating service, one that I thoroughly detested because of a crappy interface and vowed never to use. Too late, they had an email address for me (one I’d set up use with online dating), and though I’d taken a hiatus from online dating, on a whim I opted to check the account one day, for the first time in six months. Valerie had sent me a note the day before.

    She’d never expected anything to come from it, had only filled out the online form because she was bored at work. She’d given up on dating long since, and expected to die alone and lonely (or be hit by that terrorist’s bomb, I suppose). Instead, we found each other, an incredibly good fit, and the rest of our lives together.

    So, the score’s at least True Love: 2, Terrorist Bombs: 0

  12. What a touching and sweet story. Happy anniversary to you! I hope this is your sweetest year together yet, and that they only keep getting better and better. Of course now I want to hear how your relationship relates to your Trophy Wives book! Yes I know–nosy, nosy me.

    PS Isn’t your book set to be subbed early this month? Good luck!

  14. I’m so glad it was cupid’s arrow that got you and not a terrorist bomb. Good grief, how does Newsweek come up with this stuff?

    This was a beautiful post and I do hope you’ll post the sequel blog entry soon. Happy anniversary!

  15. And a very happy Anniversary to you and your beloved!!!
    Great story.

    And in the encouragement department, my older sister married for the first time at age 57. So phooey on statistics.

  21. Congratulations, Melodye!
    For two things:
    One for your anniversary, and second for finding your match the second time around.
    I love that you have date night every Friday, and the tenderness of your words when you talk about your husband, it’s heart-warming.
    🙂

  24. Oh, honey, happy anniversary! I can’t think of many more people who deserve a fabulous, romantic life.

    Go forth and anniversarate! (Yes, I’ve just made that word up for you!)

  25. OH, I love this story! I defied the odds, too. I met first husband in a bar. Didn’t bode well for when I met second husband in a bar, but we’ve been married now almost fifteen happy years!

    Congratulations and happiest of anniversaries!
    XO Candie

  26. Aww, I’m gonna cry =) That’s such a great story. And it’s yours – even better! I’m happy that you found your prince charming and are living happily ever after. Congrats on your wedding anniversary. Will you two be going anywhere special tonight?

  31. aaaw! What a wonderful story! Meodye, you are one hell of tear-jerker, do you know that?
    I love Happy Ever Afters, and stories like yours are proof against al those who claim marriage is dead!
    . Congrats, and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

  32. aaaw! What a wonderful story! Meodye, you are one hell of tear-jerker, do you know that?
    I love Happy Ever Afters, and stories like yours are proof against al those who claim marriage is dead!
    . Congrats, and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

  33. This Will Be in the Sequel to FIDDLER ON THE ROOF…

    Matchmaker, matchmaker
    You made a match
    Melodye makes
    a beautiful catch
    Long Island’s loss is a
    plus for Cali
    Joy “Four” your Anniversarrrryyyyy….

    Euuuuuu
    I’m tired!

    HAPPY HAPPY DAY, you honeymooning lovebirds :}

  34. This Will Be in the Sequel to FIDDLER ON THE ROOF…

    Matchmaker, matchmaker
    You made a match
    Melodye makes
    a beautiful catch
    Long Island’s loss is a
    plus for Cali
    Joy “Four” your Anniversarrrryyyyy….

    Euuuuuu
    I’m tired!

    HAPPY HAPPY DAY, you honeymooning lovebirds :}

  37. What a FASCINATING story! How very lovely! Thank you for sharing, Melodye. I had no idea. Well, I had a hint of idea, but I didn’t know details. This is special and sweet. Like you!

  38. What a FASCINATING story! How very lovely! Thank you for sharing, Melodye. I had no idea. Well, I had a hint of idea, but I didn’t know details. This is special and sweet. Like you!

  39. And here is wishing your and your’s a very big TEXAS size HAPPY ANNIVERSARY and I’m sure he knows how lucky he is. The Mrs and I have been married 42 years this April 7th and she reminds me all the time how lucky I am. HEHEHE, she doesn’t have to tell me because it sunk in a long time ago.

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